Today = shit

Let me just say that today=shit.

Our nanny and the one person I would have considered my best friend quit on us. No notice at all. I fear that we won’t be friends any longer because of this, though not of my choosing. It was all I could do not to break down and cry when she texted me that she was quitting.

I can only hope that had I done something to bring this about that she would have told me so that I could rectify it. Honestly, she’s been a completely different person the last several weeks and I didn’t talk much to her because I almost felt as though I was a bother if I did. We had put up with weeks of chronic lateness in addition to the surliness. Still, the kids will miss her dearly, as will I.

I’m rather concerned with how Noah will do with her gone. He lost his best friend and brother and now he’s lost another of his favorite people.

Then tonight we went grocery shopping and found out we couldn’t get the $50 in groceries we had in the cart. We wound up having to take some money out of the headstone fund to be able to afford gas to get home. I’m so tired of being broke. Jon works his ass off and we have little to show for it. Not only do some companies we sub-contract off of find any and every excuse in the book as to why they cannot pay us, but the VA really screwed us when they took us off the VetBiz registry and made it damn near impossible for us to get re-registered.

I keep thinking something’s gotta give, but it seems like it’s just a landslide of more shit.