I’ve seen occasional posts on Facebook where people complain about seeing some unknown parent going off on their kid during some outing. Then, everyone commiserates with the original poster about how awful said parent is, blah blah blah. Inevitably, someone brings up the “You Just Broke Your Child. Congratulations.” blog post.
Here’s the thing. I’ve probably been perceived much that way out in public a time or two. I bet, whether you’ll admit it or not, quite a few of you have at least once.
Unfortunately, what those that base their assessment on was only what they see before them in that instant. Not what the rest of life in that family is like. And, sure, the parents may beat the crap out of their kid, I’m not saying that doesn’t happen. I’m saying that there may very well me something else going on instead.
At least in our case, what they most likely neglected to see was that while I do indeed love my children, there are times that mommy simply loses her shit.
Losing your shit is something that’s easy to do when you’ve got a 16 month old that’s trying to pull your shirt off in front of everyone so he can eat and who thinks nothing to hit you – and that kid packs a wallop – and makes the most horrendous screech – like nothing you’ve ever heard before and didn’t know was actually humanly possible – when he’s refused or not responded to fast enough, a three year old that most likely has selective mutism in addition to being truly the most hard-headed child I’ve ever encountered, a five year old that whines excessively – about anything and everything and when he doesn’t get his way, starts barking – or sometimes growling in a way that almost sounds evil – orders to you, and an eleven year old that knows everything and the price of it – and has for a few years now – and there’s just no telling her otherwise…. yeah, it’s hard to imagine why I might yell at them now and then. Especially when we’re out in public and I can’t just send them to their room for awhile, if need be.
It’s especially cute to see these Holier-Than-Thou Moms (HTTM) who claim they never lose their cool concoct stories about how these damnable parents beat their children when no one is looking. *eyeroll* Yeah, because the HTTM have truly spent time with each and every one of these horrible parents to know exactly in what ways they are horrible. Because, apparently, the HTTM have never had a “losing your shit” moment and, naturally, that means no one else ever should. Or – my personal favorite – is when the HTTM has all the answers to what you’re doing wrong, even though she has never even seen you or your children before.
Again, only speaking for myself here, but what the HTTM also don’t see are the games, movies, books, bike rides, walks, playing, parks, and all of the other niceties that our kids get to experience. Or how about the hours spent communicating with the teachers each year of school to make sure that our kids are on par with where they need to be and if not, what we can do about it. Because we love them and care about them.
I’m pretty sure that, at the end of each day, as we tuck them into bed, our kids all know we love them, and to hell with anything else.