Today we should have been celebrating your ninth birthday. Instead we celebrated your birthday as we have for the past six of them, at your gravesite. It’s still so much not fair.
We all love and miss you, Bow.
I know that it’s been some time since I last posted anything. It’s hard, it really is. Between being so busy with life/work/home/family/everything-else, it’s easy to forget just how long it’s been since since posting last.
Henry turned six the last of January. He had his very first ever birthday party. This is a huge milestone as his Selective Mutism frequently makes things like this impossible. He still does not want to be sung to which doesn’t upset me any. I’ll let you in on a little secret: I HATE singing Happy Birthday or having it sung to me. HATE IT. I find it the most absurd tradition. I’ve never expressed it to my kids, but I’m so not upset by his decision to have everyone refrain.
On March 4, we hit the fifth anniversary of our son, Elias’, death. For some reason, this one was harder than the last couple have been. I don’t know why, well, maybe I do. I kind of wonder if it might not have something to do with Calvin turning four a few days afterward. There’s something about four… that age that Elias never reached. Well, that and others, but I think the fact that he died so close to his fourth birthday… that just weighs heavily on me. At least we’ve been able to get the other three boys to four – and beyond.
Also in March, Ceili Fey turned 14 which is incredibly hard to believe. It seems like she shouldn’t be just about to start high school.
It’s odd how, after a death like Elias’, time seems to go so slowly, yet so fast at the same time. I’m not sure how to explain it in any other terms. It may be something that is unique to the experience as I’m not sure that other “normal” people experience anything quite like it.
I should really try to post more frequently on here. I feel as though it’s been somewhat therapeutic in the past.
In any case, it’s now quitting time so I need to run. I just wanted to update you on the latest happenings in our lives. I promise I will try to do so more frequently.
Take care of yourselves, and each other.
In the past, I posted about my quest for an effective, long-lasting, safe, aluminum free deodorant. Additionally, at some point on my quest, I learned that I had a baking soda sensitivity. This definitely made things even harder. While I’ve found safe and aluminum free in abundance, effective and long-lasting (for me) has been far more difficult. I was actually to the point that I was ready to throw in the towel and go back to antiperspirant. Until I found Poofy Organics Max Deo.
Poofy Organics Max Deodorant is awesome. It’s aluminum free, toxin free, and it’s certified organic. It’s truly the best – and most effective – natural deodorant I’ve ever found. In fact, I love it so much, it’s all I use. Actually, I like Poofy Organics so much that I sell it!*
Additionally, I really want to share this great product with you. A lucky winner will win one Poofy Organics Max Deodorant in their choice of scents (available here)! If, like me, you have a baking soda sensitivity, you’ll want to choose the Sensitive version. Smells not your thing? That’s okay, we have a Plain Jane unscented version.
There are a couple of caveats here that you should know. Many people have a bit of a detoxing period when switching to a natural deodorant where they experience a few days where they feel really stinky. This does pass. Also, from time to time, do a good exfoliation on your pits in the shower, either a loofah, a sugar scrub, etc.
Good luck to everyone!
Also, my disclosure is found here.
*You can sell Poofy, too! If you’re interested in learning more about this great company that really cares about people, go to https://earthymama.poofyorganics.com/join/ or email firstname.lastname@example.org with any questions you may have!